Rejected- Part 1

It hurts...

The first time I cared...

Until I was eleven, I didn't understand what rejection was. I was a confident firecracker of a kid that didn't ever let a "no" trip me up. To me, there wasn't anything that I couldn't do if I wanted to do it. Man, I wish I still had that type of confidence. In my eyes I had things going for me, and I wasn't wrong. But I can't help but think it comical how my first blow to my confidence came around.

I was only eleven, so there hadn't been many guys that I had liked. But, in the most confident little girl way, I had never had a crush on a guy who didn't like me. Sure, that was one guy, but still. I remember going to the co-op I went to every Friday and deciding that I liked this one guy. He hung around me often enough, and I was pleased with myself, thinking he liked me to... until he told me he had a crush on my little sister. Welp. That happened. And man was it a blow to my pride.

Why does being rejected hurt so bad?

I didn't really like that guy much. And I was actually a big fan of the idea of him liking my sister. But it didn't take away the sting I felt at the moment. For the first time I could really remember, I had been rejected, and there was nothing I could do to fix it. Let me put a large emphasis on the last half of the sentence. I am a problem solver, and I like to fix things, but this? I had no power to change his mind, even if I wanted to. For once I had been rejected, and I couldn't do anything. And that hurt the most....

Rejection can come from family, school, work, life... some even say rejection is a part of life. I don't disagree. As much as I wish I could have little Kennedy's confidence, I don't think it would be wise. Because if I hadn't faced that rejection, there isn't a chance I would be where I am now. It hurts. It hurts bad. Especially when it comes from someone you care about. It can be easy to start hearing voices saying: "You're just not good enough." "You won't ever be enough." "Why are you even trying?" "No one cares."

With every word that snakes through my thoughts, it adds another weighted pressure on my shoulders. It can be hard to hear. And easy to let it force me to give up. I cannot even count the times I've been rejected in the creating of this website. I've gotten a lot of noes and very few yeses. I have not even come close to what I want this group to be at some point, but I have hope for the future. And that comes from how I choose to deal with that rejection.

Dealing with rejection

Everyone has a different way of dealing with the hurt and pain of rejection. Some people need to be alone, others surrounded by friends, but for me, the first thing I like to do is talk it out. I wish I could have said that I talked it out with God right away, but most of the time I run to my mom. And I need to change that, because while God gave us our parents and friends for a reason, we need to come to Him first. Because He is the one with power.

"Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

"Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:16

I know from experience, that dealing with rejection can be a long hard road, sometimes even spanning years, but it's what you choose to do with this rejection that matters. It's easy to talk about looking on the bright side of things, but is willful blindness really what we need? I am a die-hard optimist, but I don't even think we should be blind to the truth. The thing is, we aren't blind when we take that rejection and look at it from a perspective of seeing if there is something to learn.

I know, I know, even that isn't nearly as easy as I'm trying to make it sound. That's why I am going to take a part two to try and spit out my thoughts. But in the meantime, comment down below how you take and deal with rejection. What do you do you do when you are rejected?

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